Will Leitch, the normally level-headed contributing editor at New York Magazine, filed a piece the other day under the headline, Why You Should Root for the Warriors in the NBA Finals.

The headline, however, really should have been, Why No Right-Thinking American Should Even Consider Rooting for the Boston Celtics in the NBA Finals.

After showering the Warriors with multiple fanboy paragraphs, Leitch does the to be sure minimum for the Celtics.

In a public-relations battle between [the Warriors] and a team from Boston, it’s no contest at all. And that’s a bit of a shame, because this Celtics team is the most likable in recent memory, a cohesive unit of talented players who clearly adore having each other as teammates.

And blah blah blah Jason Tatum . . . blah blah blah Al Horford . . . blah blah blah Ime Udoka . . . blah blah blah.

But here’s the kick in the nuts graf.

If they weren’t the Celtics — which is to say if they weren’t from Boston — you’d be tempted to cheer for them. But they’re the Boston Celtics, so you can’t. You get it. The Celtics don’t inspire reflexive hatred like the Patriots. They lack the we-were-once-so-tortured-that-now-our-fans-get-to-act-like-assholes-forever vibe of the Red Sox. But they still play in a city that has won way too much over the last 20 years, trading in its underdog status for cocky villainy in the process. Plus, there are just too many Boston fans with a “let’s avoid this guy at Thanksgiving” feel about them. You want to cheer for Tatum and the crew, and then you see this and … well, it’s just really hard. Maybe in a decade or so, if no Boston team has won anything between now and then, it will be permissible to cheer for one of them. Maybe. For now, Boston will serve the role of foil.

The hardworking staff totally gets the reflexive Patriots hatred and the Masshole Red Sox fans, but Leitch’s you see this indictment of the Celtics is kinda lame.

So . . . a douchebag sat courtside at a Celtics game. See:Dog Bites Man.

As for Will Leitch Bites Celtics,: Not a lot of teeth there.